Let’s say that you have something that you wanted for so long and suddenly it is within your reach, what would you do? As much as you wanted to jump and grab it, but reality kept on toying with you, not letting you to have it, own it. I never want something so much in my life, until… 

In my personal relationship with God, I allow myself to be angry with Him. I know it might sound like I’m taking His mercy for granted. But I’m a human. And He is my friend. Have you ever felt angry toward your friend?

Things have been complicated for the past few months. I almost landed my dream job. Almost is the keyword here. I was excited at first, then day after day there was no good news comes in to greet me. I raised my hopes and expectations to God and believe He has better plan for me.

And guess what? I’m dating someone. Apart from my failures in my career, the great blessing that happened for the last few months was I’m dating my bestfriend. Will this relationship leads to Holy matrimony one day? I hope so. I’m in a complete surrendering hope in His plans. I believe He will bless whoever I choose to marry. I made this choice of dating him not without decernment to God so I believe He will guide this boat to the shore of blessed marriage.

Still, my number one lover is our Lord Jesus Christ. He was there when nobody was there for me. He was always there when everything seemed bleak. He was always there. Being in a relationship with a man only make my love for God grow because without Him, this love can never exist in the first place.

What will happen in my future? I absolutely have no idea. I can plan of course. I don’t wake up everyday, just foolishly waiting for something to happen. A new day is another day to glorify Him in our works. As I write this I pray that sloth and laziness shall not consume me in my daily works. I shall continue to write for Him and if He approves, one day I shall write for living.

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